Looks like it’s that magical time of year again, you know, that time of year when romance is almost as abundant as depression and chocolate sales.
To some people, Valentine’s Day is just another day, but to others, it’s a special chance to show how much you care about someone. There are some that go too far and make the day overwhelming and others who just don’t know what to do.
And on the same token, some people are completely clueless on what to do to make sex more special, whereas some people go overboard.
As such, I have a bunch of sexual do’s and don’ts for your Valentine’s Day endeavors.
Massage — DO. This one is great and easy. You can get a little thing of massage oil from anywhere and everyone loves massages. It can be sweet, romantic and great foreplay.
Sex Dice — DON’T. Way too awkward. I’ve seen them before and you can roll “surprise” as your action. Personally, I don’t want anyone to surprise all over my face. Enough said.
Role-playing — TIE. This one is up in the air. Whoever you’re with, whether it’s a fling or an established relationship, you probably need to discuss this before doing it. Basically, what I’m trying to say is don’t walk into my room dressed as a bunny without warning me first.
Dressing sexy — DO. Don’t get this confused with role-playing. Wearing some nice lingerie if you’re a girl or some sexy undergarments if you’re a guy is great. You definitely want to look your hottest. Make sure you shower that day, too.
Blow jobs — DO. Don’t forget about the basics.
Eating out — DO. Guys, I know this might not be basic for you, but come on, show her you care.
Flavored condoms — DO. It’s a little thing, but some people really like it.
Drinking — TIE. If you want to be fancy and drink a little beforehand, go ahead, but I’d assume that most people don’t want vomit in the bedroom.
Threesome, foursome, more — DON’T. When we were little, we gave out Valentine’s Day cards to the whole class. But I don’t think anyone would feel confident passing his or her Valentine around the class now.
Keep in mind, this isn’t the strictest list of do’s and don’ts. I’m sure I’m not your Valentine, but this list is a safe bet for a lot of people.
Overall, the best thing you can do on Valentine’s Day is to be romantic. You need to express your feelings and think of your significant other, not anyone else. Get them a single red rose, write them a sentimental message, make them dinner, do something from the heart and you’ll get closer to winning theirs. Not to mention you definitely do stand a better chance of wooing them into bed.