As I turned the corner of Leroy and Murray on Friday night, a group of male students called out to me, “Stop complaining about ‘rape culture.’ You’re not even hot enough to get raped.”
Taken aback, I remained silent, unable to muster the words to respond to such a senseless, hurtful comment.
In that moment, my peers demonstrated exactly why I cannot and will not stop speaking up about the pervasiveness of hatred toward women. Until a woman can walk down the street free from vicious attacks, there is no reason to stop the conversation. Rape culture is more than just a “hot topic.” It’s an inescapable reality.
Over the course of my time as a columnist and editor at Pipe Dream, I’ve heard complaints about the section’s “obsession” with discussions of women’s issues and sexual assault. I’ve been told it’s “overdone” and “stale.” Such criticisms miss the point. The mission of a college Op/Ed section is to start conversations about issues that affect and interest students. The reason we keep talking about rape, assault and misogyny is because actual Binghamton students experience these phenomena. And probably more than you’d think.
Rejecting a discussion on the basis that is no longer entertaining is a dangerous and careless means of consuming information. If you’re annoyed that feminist headlines are clogging up your precious newsfeed, just imagine how irritating it is to be disrespected on a daily basis for no reason other than your gender. Rape culture is not something that can be turned off in the same way one closes a Chrome tab.
The tendency to value entertainment over meaningful content is not limited to discussions of rape culture. Over the course of the summer, the online response to riots in Ferguson, MO shed light on our culture’s empathy deficit. As activists were tear gassed and beaten, many Internet users had to the gall to complain that they were growing tired of hearing so much about the Ferguson movement. In the same way that a woman can’t turn off gender, people of color deal with the implications of living as an oppressed minority every day.
But, some people, like the young men on the corner of Leroy and Murray, would rather not hear about the truth because it is unsettling and doesn’t directly affect them. It must be so hard for them to stomach reality while women and other minorities bear the brunt of a culture that hates us.
Rape is not a compliment. A threat to sexually abuse a woman is frightening, not flattering. Cat-calling is not a compliment. It’s an attack on female personhood and no woman appreciates it or should have to endure it.
To the men on the corner, if you’re reading this, my answer is no. I will never be bullied into silence. Maybe it’d be easier that way. Maybe I’d be more well-liked by my peers. If we never discuss ugly topics, change is impossible.