There comes the awkward time in pretty much everyone’s life when you find that you’re not having sex, for whatever reason, but it hasn’t stopped the rest of the world from getting down and dirty.
Sexual frustration is rough. Especially when you’re constantly reminded that other people are having sex every time you decide to dance at the Rat, or come home and find that you don’t have anywhere to sleep unless you’re willing put up with whatever banging is going on your roommate’s side of the room.
To put it bluntly, sexual frustration isn’t fun for anyone, but a lot of people deal with it on a regular basis. Maybe your moves are stale, maybe you’re in a long-distance relationship or maybe you’re just really picky — there’s nothing wrong with any of that — but there are things you can do to make it a little easier on yourself.
I think the best solution is to get a wingman. If your moves aren’t the best, then getting set up with the help of a friend is a quick fix. That friend could know someone perfect for you who you would never have found otherwise. Plus, it’s good to have someone push you out of your comfort zone if you’re not the best at flirting.
Personally, I don’t recommend finding a hookup online, if only because it’s so easy to lie about information and you never really know what you’re getting into. I do watch “Law and Order” on occasion, so that could be clouding my judgment too.
If you or your friends do get laid, let’s talk about sexiling for a second. It’s one of the oldest college frustrations and it’s in practically every college movie there is.
Still, it’s hard to ever be prepared for the harsh reality of having to sleep on a couch or search for a friend with a free bed.
The only thing I can say about it is that you should try to keep a level head. Imagine if the tables were turned. If you got lucky, you probably wouldn’t want your roommate banging down the door or lying in the bed across from you while you’re awkwardly sitting there with a potential hook-up.
If you personally don’t believe in sex (I’m trying to run a politically correct column here) then you might be out of luck as far as that reciprocation goes, but do your best to be as understanding as possible — for a lot of sexually frustrated people in college, sex is not a regular occurrence.
Whatever you guys need to do to work it out, do it. Pick a system like the classic sock on the door or just shooting them a quick text so that there’s no conflict. Nothing is worse than a fight between roommates on a night that could have been great otherwise.
One last piece of advice: You shouldn’t shy away from getting it on with yourself. Seriously, just masturbate. Sexual frustration is hard enough to deal with as it is; you don’t need to make it harder on yourself.
Guys and girls, it’s natural and, if you’re really insecure about it, try to remember that the hottest people you’ve ever seen in your life masturbate too — at least 99 percent of them, anyways.
So to sum it all up: Be choosy, be safe, be understanding and good luck!