Before I got to college there was one thing I worried about more than anything else. Ironically, it had nothing to do with realizing my life path as quickly as possible, or making sure I had the most decked-out dorm room. I wasn’t too concerned with adjusting to my class schedule or even finding my way around campus — although those anxieties did hit me pretty hard that first Monday morning. Like most of us on the cusp of entering college, my top concern when I came to Binghamton University was making friends.
I had such a close-knit group of friends in high school that that was all I wanted for my years at BU, especially with the inevitable stresses I witnessed my sisters go through during their time in college.
From difficult professors, to demanding classes, to finding that perfect summer internship, it seemed like the only way to navigate the next four unpredictable years was with a solid group of friends by my side to share those experiences with and to remind me I wasn’t alone. Lucky for me, orientation and move-in day brought me that core group of friends I so desperately desired.
Looking back now and comparing those initial months of friendship with those girls, to my friendships from home, it’s astounding how quickly I became close with people I didn’t even know existed previously. Why are we so quickly able to get to a level of closeness with college friends that is equal to — if not exceeding — that of friends from home we’ve known for years?
Maybe this doesn’t hold true for you. Still, I can attest that I attained a level of closeness with my college friends within months that it took years to get to with some of my friends growing up.
There are clearly multiple reasons for this. However, I believe college friendships are able to blossom and fully bloom so much quicker than grade school or teenage friendships because of the time and the distinct circumstances that occur in our lives.
The very fact of my living a floor above the girls I befriended allowed us to spend infinite amounts of time together. Sometimes we were productive — studying, attending classes and making those dreaded Walmart trips. Other times, we were truly unproductive — going out every weekend together, spending the obligatory three hours in the dining hall on a Saturday morning recapping everything that happened the night before and going to every general interest meeting we thought was remotely interesting. No matter what we were doing, we were doing it together.
The constant, close proximity of people our age, mixed with shared interests and hobbies and a combined want for steadfast friends on both ends creates the perfect opportunity for close friendships in college. These friendships are so distinct and lasting because they come about at a time when we are under duress from so many aspects of our lives that it seems like friends around us are the only ones that understand how we’re feeling.
Justifiably, it’s as if that the people that hold the most value in our lives are those that are in the same place, both literally and figuratively, that we are. They provide a shoulder to cry on when your first relationship here crumbles. They encourage you when GRE studying gets to be too much. They share your excitement in Tom and Marty’s with you on your 21st birthday.
Those are irreplaceable friendships that college brings about. Those are the experiences you can only have with your BU friends.