With the release of Ryan Murphy and Ian Brennan’s new biographical crime drama “Monsters: The Lyle and Erik Menendez Story,” conversations about child and sexual abuse, gender and the true meaning of “murder” are circulating once again, only this time the public is far more sympathetic.
The 1989 killings of the wealthy and prominent Jose and Kitty Menendez and the subsequent arrests of their two sons, Lyle and Erik, took the media by storm. The public was quick and attempted to label Lyle and Erik as cold-hearted killers and spoiled brats who murdered their parents for monetary gain. In 1994, when the trial began, no one expected the brothers to testify that they indeed killed their parents out of self-defense, claiming they had suffered a lifetime of sexual abuse. The brothers were widely not believed, and this was made clear as their emotional testimonies were mocked in a now infamous Saturday Night Live sketch.
In a second 1996 trial, the brothers were sentenced to life in prison without the possibility of parole. However, the Los Angeles County District Attorney, George Gascón, recently announced that he feels a “moral and ethical obligation” to review new evidence that has been brought forward suggesting a history of sexual abuse from Jose Menendez, not only to his sons but to another boy he worked with at his record label as well.
Celebrities, such as Kim Kardashian and Rosie O’Donnell, have come forward calling for the release of the brothers, making it clear that attitudes toward male victims of sexual assault are changing. Still, a change in public opinion does not mean there will be a fundamental change in the way cases of male abuse, specifically male child abuse, are tried in court.
It has long been said that “the only perfect victim is a dead one,” and when victims don’t fit this mold and fight back or are outspoken, wealthy, too attractive or unattractive, male and even cocky at times, like the Menendez brothers, they become subject to scrutiny and people are less inclined to believe them. This mindset needs to be abolished as it is not only counterproductive but also dangerous — it makes victims less likely to come forward with their stories and allows abusers to walk free.
During the 90s, there seemed to be a widespread mindset that men could not be victims of sexual abuse, but this could not be further from the truth. In the case of the Menendez brothers, the jury in the 1996 trial was split by sex, with the female jurors believing the brother’s stories of sexual abuse and advocating for manslaughter chargers and the male jurors seeing the brothers as greedy monsters and advocating for first-degree murder. One of the jurors, Tracy Miller, stated, “There were insults, sexual comments. They tried to outshout us.”
Female jurors also recall a fascination the male jurors had with the Menendez brothers being secretly homosexual and, therefore, consenting to the abuse. This was an idea pushed by the prosecution and recalled by Erik in the brother’s infamous interview with Barbara Walters — he said, “The prosecutor brought that up because I was sexually molested, and he felt in his own thinking that if I was sodomized by my father that I must have enjoyed it and therefore I must be gay.” It is little comments like these that stop male victims from coming forward and making a mockery of their trauma. They cannot be men and victims but rather must be men and active participants — to think otherwise would threaten society’s all-powerful view of masculinity.
Male victims of sexual abuse notoriously stay silent. According to the U.K.’s Office for National Statistics, “49% of male abuse victims fail to tell anyone about their abuse and are 2 and half times less likely to tell someone than female victims.” This is largely due to fear of ridicule, not being believed, being labeled as homosexual or being seen as less of a man. However, Erik’s former defense attorney, Leslie Abramson, posed critical questions and analysis toward the jury in closing arguments that are still relevant today — “Would you feel any differently about what happened to my client if my client’s name was Erika Menendez? Would it make any difference to you if he was a girl who was sadistically sexually molested by her father? Because if it would, it shouldn’t, because men are human, and boys are human. And men and women suffer, and boys and girls suffer, and it is no different.”
According to the U.S. Sentencing Commission, the average sentence for offenders convicted of rape is 192 months, for abusive sexual contact, it is 60 months and for statutory rape, it is 43 months. It is morally unjust that some rapists and pedophiles spend less time in prison than victims, like the Menendez brothers, who kill their abusers. No victim, especially one who has experienced years of abuse at the hands of the same perpetrator, should receive the same sentence as a serial killer or a murderer of an innocent person.
Freeing the Menendez brothers would not only deliver justice in their case but also send a powerful message to male victims of abuse — their experiences are being acknowledged and believed. As a society, we must not only condemn violence but also understand that under some extreme circumstances, such as a lifetime of child abuse, victims may see no other way out. If the Menendez brothers allowed the abuse to continue or threatened to go public with it, they very well could have been the ones that ended up dead.
When someone’s quality and longevity of life are threatened, when they defend themselves against an oppressor, they should not receive a life sentence. Likewise, we must shift our mindset toward male victims, offering them the resources, support and legal assistance they need. By doing so, men and boys trapped in abusive cycles can find safer, healthier ways to seek help rather than feeling pushed toward desperate actions like those taken by the Menendez brothers.
Jordan Ori is a junior majoring in English and a Pipe Dream Opinions intern.
Views expressed in the opinions pages represent the opinions of the columnists. The only piece that represents the view of the Pipe Dream Editorial Board is the staff editorial.