People are fucked up. Try as we might, there is no way to sugarcoat it.

People do horrible things to each other, are constantly irrational and are rarely ‘ if ever ‘ involved in any line of thinking that comes close to making sense. Part of the reason for this is that many people are generally crazy, but a big reason why people are so weird is the fact that, in general, people just cannot interact with others.

Honestly, it’s all rooted in one simple fact: In general, people will look out for their own interests above all else. While this might be a great help in trying to grow a free market economy, it can be a great hindrance when it comes to forming interpersonal relationships.

Be it an acquaintance, a friendship or even a romantic relationship, the sad truth is that a large portion of the population will have an incredibly hard time learning how to think of others first, and thus will have a very hard time taking part in a healthy relationship of any sort.

So how do we work around this problem? Do we all just resign ourselves to the fact that we will never be able to have a functional relationship with another human being because we are just so darn selfish?

Obviously not. However, we do have to take special care in how we approach our interactions with other people, especially if it is in a relationship that can be qualified as intimate.

Know going into any sort of relationship that the other person may not be as quick to reciprocate your level of commitment, and be prepared for the eventuality that the other person may ‘ and probably will ‘ put his or her own feelings and well-being above yours almost all the time.

It is not fair to ask so much of someone to put the well-being of someone else in front of his own, especially when the relationship shared with that person is still in the infant stages. That said, let’s see you put yourself on the other side of the spectrum as the less-involved and less-caring person.

Just as it is not fair for you to ask so much of someone else, it is certainly not fair for someone to ask the same of you. It is your job to look out for yourself, first and foremost, especially when a relationship is just starting out. If you open yourself up too early, you are basically inviting the universe to take a giant steaming shit on your life, as well as welcoming other people to hurt you.

In order for a person to enter into a healthy relationship, be it a friendship or something more, that person really has to be comfortable and OK with himself first. So instead of being upset at the inherently selfish nature of people, I say embrace it! Use it as a way ‘ or an excuse ‘ to re-examine how you feel about yourself, as well as a way to work out any personal problems you may have.

Lord knows we’re all fucked up in one way or another. I just hope that we can all become comfortable enough with our messed-up selves and find another individual who is more than willing to not only accept all our bullshit, but love us because of it.

And hey, if worst comes to worst, just remember that there’s always someone out there more desperate than you for affection. You just have to be the one to find them.