I’ve been in Binghamton for three Super Bowls, and for my final big game here at BU I decided to watch by myself because I was tired of going to parties and places where the game took second billing to people’s stories about their Saturday night hookups. So, I decided to just rant during the game, and despite a painstakingly dull first half marred with fumbles and mud, it was an interesting night. Let’s recap Sunday’s telecast of Super Bowl XLI.

Pregame

I’d like to extend an invitation to the CBS pregame crew to grow a set and say what’s actually on their minds. These geniuses spent the pregame show saying that the weather would not make a difference.

They went over Peyton Manning’s past playoff failures instead. Thanks for helping out the seven people who had no idea.

That’s strike one on CBS. Strike two just for subjecting me to 360 solid minutes of Shannon Sharpe thinking he had to talk louder than everyone else.

Then James Brown cuts off the soldiers who were saying ‘Hi’ to their mothers back home. Great. I mean come on JB, Saturday Night Live wouldn’t even try to make that funny.

That clock on my screen counting down to kickoff has been irritating me since I woke up this morning. No joke.

First Quarter

I managed to keep my cool for the first 15 minutes of play. But if I know most sports fans, after Devin Hester’s kickoff return 14 seconds in, Peyton Manning was already the worst Super Bowl quarterback of all time.

Did I mention that half of the Colt tacklers missed because they slipped on the grass? I’m not going to bother counting the number of weather related issues the game brings out.

It’s becoming clear that Peyton Manning is nervous. He is picked off on the Colts’ first possession, solidifying his place as the worst quarterback of all time with almost 58 minutes to go.

Manning will need his wideouts to get very open downfield for him to make the throws in this weather, or Indy will have to rely on the run game and short passes. Not exactly Colts football, but in this game you do what you have to. The Bears have the momentum right now, but that could backfire if they over-pursue Manning.

On cue, how does Reggie Wayne get that open on a play when Manning is about to be sacked? The Bears over-pursued. Nice.

Colts kick away from Hester, Bears fumble the kickoff return. Colts catch a break.

This could be a long night. Indy fumbles on first play, so much for that break they caught ‘

Bears have 14 in the first quarter, and it’s soaking wet ‘ if Chicago could have written a start to this one, this is how it would have gone.

Isn’t it always fun to poke fun at the top announcers who after a full year of work and more than ample study time still can’t learn the names of the players in the most watched television event of the year? I mean come on, at least know the starters.

Phone call log: My brother Peter calling me to brag that my pick is losing: 2. My calls to Peter when the Colts score approximately four seconds after the phone call: 0. My mom always said I was the mature one.

Second Quarter

This quarter is very dull.

‘ Adam Vinatieri has won two Super Bowls with his right foot, kicking indoors in one and in perfect weather in Texas for another. I don’t know about sleet and snow but rain sure seems to bother him. Shanks it wide left, a perfect ending to 30 minutes demonstrating that the story of the first half is ‘Mother Nature.’ I’m not sure how exactly, but it feels like the perfect setting for Prince to expose his right nipple.

Halftime

Since Janet Jackson’s nipple made its appearance we’ve seen Paul McCartney, the Rolling Stones and Prince. Granted, McCartney and the Stones are decent, but mostly for the senior citizens who use the intermission to nap. Was the Jackson thing really worth it if Prince is considered pushing the limits?

Haven’t heard from Peter in awhile ‘

Third Quarter

This is why the Colts are good, they make adjustments, even ones that defy imagination. They have lived on the run and screen passes because the weather limits what Manning can do, so give Dungy and offensive coordinator Tom Moore credit for going with what was working, not the old ‘stick with what you’re used to’ approach; if they tried that they may have lost this game in the second quarter.

I’ve never seen announcers so amazed that a player did not fumble on a play, when Joseph Addai manages to hold onto the ball when the Bears try to strip it away in the middle of the opening drive.

Give Indy credit: 13 plays, three points, half the quarter gone, a five-point lead and not one play over 10 yards with Manning behind center So much for the Bears keeping their D off the field.

You never like to admit being fooled by a commercial, but the spot that makes you actually believe you are seeing a preview for an action movie only to realize e*trade just punked everyone watching at home deserves mention. I’m ashamed, but well-played, online stock trading site.

The Bears come out on offense for the first time in an hour, get two pretty big plays, then Grossman falls while being pursued by the Colts. Then the same thing happens again. Second and 1, to 3rd and 12, to 4th and 23. You can hear Chicago fans asking for Brian Griese.

Chicago picks up 15 quick yards on the ground, then Grossman forgets what to do. Almost throws a pick. Rex Grossman overthrows his receiver down the middle, and for a moment he looks injured. He gets up and stays in the game. Jay Mariotti starts to cry.

Fourth Quarter

Have we ever seen a game so one-sided but still so close?

Rex Grossman throws the wussiest pass in the history of any brand of football and it’s picked off and returned for a touchdown. Replays show that Muhammad gave the route away by hesitating; Bears fans don’t care. They blame Grossman thinking he was Jewish. He is not.

It’s 9:36 p.m. and the game is 10 playing minutes from over. I get that you don’t want the east coast audience to fall asleep, but if the NFL makes us wait two weeks for this game anyway, can’t they wait until 8 p.m. to start?

A promo for CBS drama ‘Criminal Minds’ about an episode featuring downloading of Web videos. They use the phrases ‘sudden death,’ ‘instant replay’ and ‘time is running out.’ Well crafted Les Moonves and staff, well crafted.

The girls are starting to leave Super Bowl parties everywhere, say a few words pretending they know what they were just watching, then admit they were just getting bored. Time is truly running out.

Grossman takes a page out of the improvised Manning playbook and tries a screen pass and completes it. Good job Ron Turner, another half hour of calling plays like that and you might get back in this one.

With the game on the line, Grossman throws a nice pass but it’s dropped on 4th and 9 to essentially end it, but five minutes remain. Tick tock ‘ please go faster.

Teams preparing for the draft start looking for a second running back so they can have the two back attack next year, too. Those teams still won’t have Peyton Manning.

Trendy MVP pick for Colts fans, Rex Grossman.

Nantz is telling stories about how nice Tony Dungy is. Grossman completes two very nice passes. No one notices.

‘The Colts of Indianapolis,’ not the Indianapolis Colts, according to Jim Nantz, are Super Bowl champs ‘ Manning gets the Marino elephant off his back, in front of Dan’s fans and CBS employee Marino no less, who looks visibly confused ‘ At least people finally know what Roger Goodell looks like ‘ Will Jim Sorgi really be allowed to say he contributed to a Super Bowl win? ‘ Lovie Smith has tons more class than Bill Belichick, it’s obvious by the way he handles losing.

Time to call Peter.