If you walk around campus, the odds are that you’ve seen the fliers proclaiming the wonder that is conservation. By this, I mean that, in case you were unaware, we are in the midst of a conservation competition with ourselves, spanning the glorious age of Feb. 6 to March 10.

I was thrilled to see that we were at last being challenged to do something other than “dress to impress.” I began to ponder ways in which I could contribute to this noble cause, when suddenly I realized that there was a nearby poster to help me on this quest. Imagine my excitement; these people had thought of everything! I wouldn’t even have to think on my own!

In the natural progression that typically accompanies waiting for an elevator to show up (I’ll conserve, but I refuse to carry trays of food up that many flights of stairs), I read the other nearby posters. I was stunned to discover that in addition to providing me with a list of ways to conserve energy, I could even help to win prizes, and thus create that heartwarming bond of team spirit with other residents of my community.

Alas, I should have seen trouble lurking, the metaphorical shit awaiting the fan. “CONTEST PRIZES” the sign proclaimed, followed by some contest details, and then the fine print. Well, not that fine, but my vision sucks. I leaned in to see the catch, and then saw the following:

“THE WINNING COMMUNITY WILL RECEIVE A GRAND PRIZE OF: RECREATIONAL AND ENTERTAINMENT EQUIPMENT SUCH AS PLASMA TVS FOR THE COMMUNITY. THE GRAND PRIZE WILL TOTAL APPROXIMATELY $20,000.”

Well, it didn’t hit me until about the umpteenth time I saw one of these signs that something was amiss. Then I realized it was because I was only using the elevator when I was carrying food to my room to eat (because I was conserving), and thus too hungry to process thought.

Did you figure it out? I’ll give you a hint. Last I checked, stop me if I’m wrong, plasma TVs don’t run on solar power. That’s right, for efforts to conserve energy, we are to be rewarded with $20,000 worth of stuff that devours energy. Brilliant.

I like the environment. I’m all about saving it. I try to do things that don’t hurt it. I think Binghamton needs more recycling bins. This is all besides the point. Regardless, I simply cannot comprehend that someone who has enough of an environmental interest to propose this contest would propose energy-consuming prizes. I totally see why there needs to be a prize — I just don’t understand why it couldn’t be something that was either more of a necessity, or less detrimental to the environment.

And at least, if it was going to be something that required the consumption of energy, I’m sure every resident of CIW would have appreciated a Panini-maker for our dining hall to ANY television out there. Or $20,000 worth of non-Sodexho food. That would be good too.

Molly Ariotti is a freshman political science major.