I have a little pet peeve.

Besides the phrase “pet peeve” itself, there is something that really offends me, and it should be put to a halt immediately.

Now, I’d like to begin with a disclaimer: I am no feminist. I believe in dressing sexy (not so sexy that you wear jeans three times smaller than your actual size, which results in your love handles squeezing out and molesting a random innocent passerby. That is a no-no). Otherwise, I completely endorse the occasional provocative ensemble — dressing sluttish and showing off skin (if the appropriate occasion should arise).

Yet, there is one particular display that I wish my eyes would never be subjected to again: your thong peeking out of your pants.

Thongs have a variety of purposes. Like, it is absolutely awful to see panty lines when a girl is wearing tight pants, so a thong is the next best thing to going commando. Thongs are also sexy, and if they’re worn properly … very comfortable.

See, I don’t mind thongs. I love thongs — thongs are magnifique! My concern is that I do not want to see your thong when you bend over in class. In fact, I do not want to see your thong when you are standing upright.

Thongs are meant to be seen by your lovers. I couldn’t care less if it is lacy, silky or made out of candy; leave it for the bedroom (or the Nature Preserve …). Otherwise, there is something utterly putrid about the strings of a thong hanging above the band of the pants. When you see this monstrosity of a sight, it makes you feel awkward. You start contemplating a variety of preposterous thoughts: Is she wearing it out on purpose? How many days has she worn that thing in a row? Heh.

I mean, the only thing worse than seeing the thong, is seeing the crack. I don’t want to see your ass-crack. WEAR YOUR PANTS ABOVE YOUR ASS. Thanks ;-).

Nicole Zimmerman is a sophomore psychology major. She suggests that you keep your undergarments where they belong: under your garments.