I… what? The hell is this? Well, the first song is slightly catchy but in a way that makes you want to smash your own face in with a cinder block. The second song opens like fingernails on a chalkboard and past that, there’s nothing. Third track? Madonna’s speaking French and that pretty much seals the deal on this garbage. She claims “I’ve heard it all before” and I can say the same thing. This is the same trash that Madonna has been putting out for years. I would rather pressure cook a burlap sack full of live kittens than have to listen to this. Rumor has it that Madonna’s own husband admitted to her that this album blows. I’m with him. She should stick to making out with Britney Spears—at least that’s semi-entertaining. Don’t take the above review as anti-Semitism, please. Just because Madonna is an upstanding member of the Jewish faith and a hardcore practitioner of Kabbalah doesn’t mean her music doesn’t suck donkey balls.