It’s Valentine’s Day, and you still need a date. Luckily, you have all types of friends on campus — liberal arts majors, STEM (science, technology, engineering and mathematics) majors, social sciences majors and business majors — but which one is right for you? Here at Release, we put together a quiz to help you find your true love:
1. What would your perfect Binghamton date be?
A. Coffee for two at John Arthur Cafe, where you and your date fawn over the fact that you’re drinking fair trade on campus.
B. Your date reserves a science lab for the two of you to conduct some chemistry experiments of mutual attraction.
C. You and your date sit in the Marketplace psychoanalyzing everyone who walks by while discussing social constructs.
D. You spend the night looking up how many points your stocks dropped today. If you gained some, maybe your date will get lucky.
2. How important is money in your relationship?
A. All you need is love, and a Netflix account so you can watch “Doctor Who” together.
B. I’m going to have to pay off my loans after med school, so pretty important.
C. Money is just a means created by society, but I’ll take some if you have it.
D. I want to be “Wolf of Wall Street” rich.
3. What quality is most important to you?
A. A sense of creativity and knowing what an Oxford comma is.
B. The ability to think logically and navigate the maze that is the Engineering Building.
C. An analytical personality and having a unique political view instead of just whatever your parents think.
D. A competitive spirit and the concept of having a job after graduation.
4. What’s your favorite ice cream flavor?
A. Salted Caramel
B. Vanilla
C. Nietzsche didn’t eat ice cream.
D. Pistachio
5. What would you prefer to do on a given night?
A. See the Undergrounds show featuring that campus band that only the bandmates’ parents have heard of.
B. Provide moral support while I do another lab assignment.
C. Take a personality test. Meta, right?
D. Lay on your pile of future money.
6. Who would you rather have dinner with?
A. Anton Chekhov
B. Albert Einstein
C. Freud, always Freud.
D. Bernie Madoff
7. What’s your favorite dance move?
A. A classic jazz square.
B. I don’t dance because I am not a fun person.
C. Interpretive dance.
D. Is this dance going to be black tie or CEOs and corporate hos?
8. How would your friends describe you?
A. A critical thinker who enjoys seeing things in new lights.
B. Too much work to have friends.
C. A person who questions everything society has to offer.
D. Someone who likes to get down to business.
If you got mostly A’s, you should be dating a humanities/art major!
Congratulations! You should be dating a humanities major. These include bearded English majors, struggling artists and aspiring performers. You probably enjoy long discussions about literary fiction, checking out art at the Bundy Museum or watching esoteric Sidney Lumet films with your significant other. Humanities majors are awesome because they usually have great imaginations that can go a long way when planning dates, or even in the bedroom. But beware, insulting their favorite writer or artist could cause catastrophe for your relationship.
If you got mostly B’s, you should be dating a STEM major!
Congratulations! You should be dating a STEM major. If you’re not one, you probably don’t know that STEM stands for science, technology, engineering and math. You probably enjoy logical discussions, random YouTube videos about dry ice or have even developed an algorithm to find your soul mate. STEM majors are awesome partners since they are logical and can usually teach you something that will make you seem way smarter than you actually are. Always make sure to plan ahead with STEM majors so your relationship doesn’t get stuck in a lab with them.
If you got mostly C’s, you should be dating a social sciences major!
Congratulations! You should be dating a social sciences major. These include your favorite psychology/sociology double majors, philosophy majors, and fact-crazy history majors. You probably enjoy intense people watching, tracking social movements (from party to party) and diagnosing your friends. Social sciences majors will always know what you’re feeling, so you’ll never have to worry about miscommunication again. Be careful not to talk about things in a finite manner, or it might be the end of your relationship.
If you got mostly D’s, you should be dating a business major!
Congratulations! You should be dating a business major. Whether they have a concentration in marketing, accounting or global management, anyone you choose most likely looks good in a pants suit. You probably enjoy checking the stock market, figuring out new ways to make money and managing a group of people when you go out on the weekends. Dating business majors is fun, since their drive to be the best will always keep them at the top of their game. Make sure you don’t dress better than them on suit day, though, or you may not be the right fit.