So it’s another school year, another opportunity to meet new people, make some mistakes and forget about them the next day. But history does have a way of repeating itself, and you’re bound to run into a certain ex of yours Downtown or on campus. So what can you do?
Well here’s the situation: whether it be an ex-boyfriend or an ex-hookup, the initial run-in can be incredibly awkward, somewhat embarrassing and possibly painful. Who knows what really happened over the summer? Did your former significant other hook up with anyone? Fall in love? Is he or she still the same sleazy asshole who broke your heart? All these questions come with reasonable doubt and with a certain curiosity that Facebook stalking just can’t satisfy. You want to hear it from the source.
The No. 1 big mistake that most people make is trying to avoid or ignore the fact that you just saw your ex. Even though the breakup may have been awkward or you still have feelings for the other person, nothing screams “I’m an awkward individual” more than ignoring the person you had a relationship with. It’s all about maturity. Act like the bigger person by coming up to him, asking him how his summer went and maybe even introducing yourself to his new squeeze.
Or the situation can be flipped around. What if you bump into your ex while out with your new beau? What exactly is the protocol? Well you have to try to keep it drama-free and introduce your new boyfriend or girlfriend to your old one, even if you ended things horribly with the latter. The odds are pretty good that your new partner wants to see you handle this situation with your old one well, and that means acting polite and acknowledging your ex.
“Seeing your ex unexpectedly can totally throw you off your guard and make the situation embarrassing and awkward,” said Monica Drum, a junior majoring in philosophy. “But, if you know how to handle yourself and act mature, you can make him wish he never let you go.”
Seeing an ex can have some positive outcomes too. This could possibly be the last opportunity you have to make him or her incredibly jealous with how well you handled the breakup or even how you’ve met someone else. Don’t back away from your ex just because you’re nervous. You never know, you may just come out on top.
Heather Priest, a junior majoring in environmental studies, tries to be on good terms with her exes from college.
“I can’t imagine not talking to people I’ve been in a prior relationship with,” she said. “You’ve shared a part of yourself with the other person, so pretending you don’t know each other is really only lying to yourself.”
The fact of the matter is that you can’t erase what happened between you and your ex, and trying to ignore them will just make you feel worse. Come to terms with it, act civilized and friendly, and who knows maybe you guys will even end up being good friends. Or maybe you’ll just file his name away under the “Poor Decisions” folder.