With the start of dreaded finals week finally upon us, here are some procrastination tips for when you realize you’ve been reading the same sentence 15 times.
1. It would be too obvious to, say, go on Facebook, but some have resorted to blocking their Facebook pages for finals week. So if you don’t want to write your paper, spend more time blocking the page, then work through unblocking it in order to procrastinate even more.
2. Did you know you can rent movies for only $1 in the basement of the Old University Union? Watching “Black Swan” and “Crazy, Stupid, Love” is not wasting hours of time, but will just expand your capacity to think. Especially after studying Ryan Gosling’s abs.
3. The holidays are coming up, and that means holiday desserts too. So get in shape before going home and check out those free classes that FitSpace offers, before the East Gym re-opens. All of them.
4. Get hooked on “The Big Bang Theory.” The genius characters and their impressive knowledge will inspire you to study your heart out. But only after watching five episodes per night.
5. Write an article about procrastinating for Pipe Dream.
6. Skype with friends from home. Since the winter break is fast-approaching and you will soon see them in person, what better time to catch up over a nice video chat? Or what the heck, even Skype your roommate — when you are in the same room. You will be laughing so hard at the absurdity you will forget all about the studying.
7. Check out the Release section’s “Looking for Stuff to Do.” You won’t be disappointed.
8. Time is running short, so grab a milkshake from the College-in-the-Woods Nite Owl before going home. It’s enticing, it’s delicious and it’s hard to drink from a straw. No one will judge you if you take over an hour to drink it while chatting with friends.
9. Realize you have not had a Mallomar in a long time, which means missing out on graham cracker, chocolate and marshmallow goodness in cookie form. Go on a quest to Wegmans to find them. They will console you as you pull an all-nighter to make up for the time you have lost.
10. If you want to trick yourself into believing that you are going to study this time, go to the Glenn G. Bartle Library and explore the different floors looking for the perfect concentration spot. You will get so lost that you won’t end up studying anyway.