Erica has recently taken a crap.

You probably already knew that though. You also probably know that I’m a psychology major whom you will see Downtown in a few days, completely obliterated, because my 21st birthday is coming up.

Want to delve a little deeper? That used to mean reading my Facebook profile and learning that my favorite book is “The Outsiders” and that I am passionate about meats, cheeses and nuts. Now you can find out from your homepage what party I’m going to be at, who I’m going with and what I had to say about it on people’s walls.

I’m sure there are a lot of boyfriends and girlfriends out there who aren’t too happy to find out that their significant other is sending messages to an ex, or maybe to that exotic girl in accounting class. Get ready to see a lot more “Liz Breunag is no longer in a relationship” updates, because Facebook is going to prematurely kill a bunch of them.

As if it wasn’t freaky enough meeting a stranger at the bar who knows what high school you went to and who you’re friends with, now Facebook has to give the entire world a news feed about my life? What next? Is it going to stream live video from my bedroom or something? I’d better see some royalties for that at least.

Facebook was once the classy website that discriminated against all the deadbeat kids back home by requiring a college e-mail address to join. Myspace was the scary Web site. My 17-year-old sister claims to be 21 years old and from the Bronx, so God knows the hot 21-year-old from Michigan that I’m friends with might really be a 40-year-old pedophile. Now, Facebook, you, sadly are trash, ranking somewhere between the HMChem Web site and dumpersluts.com.

I just want some privacy back. I’d like to meet someone and actually get to introduce myself instead of having them know everything about me. I shouldn’t have to worry about getting a job or being accepted to graduate schools because I have a few photos posted of me with a drink in hand. Above all, I shouldn’t have to worry that my boyfriend is going to be updated whenever I post sweet love nothings written in Russian on his best friend’s wall.

Facebook, you have failed me. My life is not a soap opera. I keep it as drama-free as possible and would like to continue to do that. I don’t need some crazy bitch having beef with me because I posted “physics class is fun!” on her boyfriend’s wall. Give me my old Facebook back or you’ll be sure to see this new update: Erica Fritz is no longer a Facebook account user.

Erica Fritz is a senior psychology major.