The other day, I was ambling through my neighborhood on the South Side of Binghamton when my peaceful afternoon was disturbed by a wild turkey. That’s right — a wild turkey, the kind you don’t want to take home to mother.
Yes, turkeys are one of nature’s many creatures that you will find residing within the greater Binghamton area. Though they are not as noticeable as the deer (or giant chipmunks as they are often known in outdoorsman circles) they make a decent living nonetheless.
Of course this whole incident must sound awfully coincidental considering that a few days from now we’ll be celebrating Thanksgiving, a day known for the consumption of turkey.
While only a few will be reading this since you will have likely left for home by the time the papers get distributed to the racks of most convenient access, I assure you, this encounter did indeed happen. And it not even my first encounter with Ben Franklin’s intelligent bird.
The year was 1994, Bill Clinton was in office, the Internet was in its infancy (being taught to walk by Al Gore) and life was good. These were simpler times. Times when people would play baseball in their backyard instead of playing video baseball on their cellular phones.
My tale is no different: I was playing baseball in my backyard when out of nowhere (well actually probably out of an egg) came a wild turkey (possibly an ancestor to the one that accosted me this past week) leaping and bounding across my backyard.
Was I shocked? Of course I was shocked; it was then that I realized that Binghamton was wild country (age 10).
Along with my sense of safety in my backyard, my baseball game was also ruined, thus adding to my angst towards turkeys.
I cannot wait for Thanksgiving. It is by far my favorite holiday not only because I can have my revenge on the quasi-flightless bird that has now twice harassed me, but all the sitting and eating, sitting and eating, watching football, and then discussing how the leftovers are to be dispersed throughout the family, what could be better?
Now I’m sure there are some preconceived notions about how we “Townies” celebrate Thanksgiving. And let me tell first off that not everyone in Binghamton grabs “Ol’ Blue” and shoots themselves a turkey and or squirrel.
At this point you are probably thinking, “hmmm, he’s talking about Thanksgiving, bet he’s gonna try and work the combine the history of Binghamton and the history of Thanksgiving.”
Well I’m not; I’m going to take a step away from my typical formula, and do something crazy and new, like using two semicolons in the article. Think you can find them?
Dan Lyons is a senior English and biology major