In today’s relationships, courtship is a thing of the past. Only in very rare instances do we see a wooing period preceding the serious relationship phase. Has courtship come to an end in today’s society, or has it changed into something else completely?

Have you ever seen those movies when dating was highlighted and dragged on for months often without any physical contact but intense conversations? Today, young people no longer uphold such traditions. Instead, people are going to bars, drinking as if they haven’t had water for days and hooking up with the first person they meet. Soon enough, two complete strangers are on the dance floor, groping each other like a cop frisking a criminal.

What’s wrong with this scene? First off, you have two people all “touchy-feely,” getting to know each other physically before they get to know each other mentally. And we wonder why these relationships don’t work. A relationship purely based on physical attraction won’t go beyond that phase. Often it’ll end in tragedy, for at least one person involved.

Courtship has also transformed in its approach. Instead of carrying on discreet conversations with the person they’re interested in, many males now utilize cheesy pick-up lines. Now the “courtship” begins with a “How you doin’?” or a “Hey girl, you look so fine in that miniskirt.” There’s no respect for the woman. She must now endure such idiotic behavior when she simply wants to talk to someone without being verbally harassed in the process. Is there such a thing as two people who can talk to each other without feeling the need to be physical?

Verbal harassment is not the only part of today’s warped courtship ritual. Now an uncomplicated smile of affection turns into a signal suggesting that the smiler wants to sleep with the recipient of that smile. Had this been a century earlier, the act of smiling wouldn’t have even been thought to be a precursor to a physical relationship. It would’ve been seen as only a smile, nothing more. But today we’re so engrossed with ourselves that we think that this simple act of kindness must mean something more. I’m sorry to all you men out there who think that when a girl smiles at you she wants to sleep with you. I know that you think you are “all that and a bag of chips,” but seriously, no one wants to go out with a tool.

Courtship has come a long way. Back in the day, dating was slow and steady. We now have people who go out simply for physical pleasure. Too many guys expect a little “something” from the one they pursue, rather than meaningful conversations with the girls sitting next to them. Yes, courtship is dead. This warped ritual should revert to its traditional ways. Sorry to disappoint all the guys out there, but not all girls are willing to give it up as quickly as you’d like them to.

Eun Sil Kang is a junior English major.