Lock: JEERS (-7) over Chad Pennington

Chad: Laveranues, are they booing me?

Laveranues: Uh, no, they’re saying ‘(Eagles CB Sheldon) Boo-rown, Boo-rown.’

Chad: I don’t see how that’s any better ‘ Philadelphia (-3) over JETS.

Game 1: Bills fans (+53) over DEPRESSION

After 13 years, Monday Night Football finally returned to Buffalo. The only problem was that, despite three defensive/special team TDs, the Bills still lost on a last-second FG by Dallas. With no game for the Bills this week, fans will just have to revel in the misery that is Dolphins football to feel better ‘ CLEVELAND (-5) over Miami.

Game 2: PATRIOTS (+4 1⁄2) over Disrespect

Randy Moss was offended Tuesday when told he would not receive the Super Bowl MVP now, but instead has to play out the rest of the season for a shot at the title. ‘It’s an outrage,’ Moss said. ‘I’m only used to playing this many games a season wholehearted ‘ New England (-6 1⁄2) over DALLAS.

Game 3: Shameless promotion (-11) over Integrity

I’ve decided to use this space for Box Seat Central, my sports talk show on BTV Channel 6 [Wednesdays, 8 to 9 p.m.]. Either that or I could have wasted your time trying to justify a Bucs rushing attack without Cadillac Williams and Michael Pittman ‘ Tennessee (+3) over TAMPA BAY.