Being that Valentine’s Day is just around the corner and the media does an impressive job of ingraining the idea of love into our minds, I have, in a way, fallen victim to the trap, and have found myself reflecting on what it means to be in love with someone. I also keep listening to the song by the Gym Class Heroes, ‘Cupid’s Chokehold’ (keeping in theme), and although I understand that the Gym Class Heroes are not meant to be authorities on the complex idea of love, their lyrics stuck out in my mind:

‘I mean she even cooks me pancakes and Alka Seltzer when my tummy aches, if that ain’t love then I don’t know what love is.’

Even though this a silly idea that is most likely compiled in the effort to sound salable and catchy, it has made me wonder about how we can determine the reason why we are in love. This comes into question, especially when your significant other, seated next to you on the couch, decides to turn to you, with glassy eyes, and pose the question: ‘Baby, why do you love me?’

Depending on what kind of person we’re dealing with here, the questioner might be plenty satisfied with the answer, ‘Hun, it’s because you cook me pancakes, and give me Alka Seltzer when my stomach aches, if that’s not love, I don’t know what love is.’ If this was the answer someone had given me, I would be completely dissatisfied. Aside from the fact that I’m a tough customer, this answer would not work for me because then I could simply say, ‘Yeah, well I love you because you can fix my car if it breaks down, you give a really good back massage and you can make me laugh, but hey, I’d be worried if I were you, because I know someone at work that can do all those things, too.’

Obviously, I would be making a mockery out of this, but my intent would be to show him that his answer is cheap ‘ it’s superficial. I would rather have the person look back at me and say that they can’t explain the reason; it’s not a concrete kind of thing. Because when I’m told that the abridged reason for loving me is because I can cook well and help him when he’s sick, then I’m no more significant than the next person out there that can do the same thing, and maybe even make tastier pancakes.

I will give the Gym Class Heroes’ lyricists some credit. That kind of answer is clearly not meant to be taken literally. The reason that person has chosen to list those everyday niceties is because to think about love as a bigger picture, outside of the details that go on day-by-day in a relationship, is to ask someone to explain the inexplicable. The frustrating part is that those small examples of love are petty in comparison to the feeling inside of you when you are in love with another person. It’s only covering a small portion of what you have in mind, and the rest is just left up to a mutual understanding between you and your significant other, who hopefully has the same inexplicable feelings for you that you do.